The Great Viva Day - Part 2

  So the first question my invigilator ask to me was, "what's your roll no. Son?" And the first thing came into my mind was, "chalo ye pta hai mujhe!".
   So she pass a register to me and told me to make a signature against my name, and during that time she asked, "Did you read Bartend's essay". Ok Let me tell you bout Bartend Russel, dude this man is ridiculous. Matlab wo Shashi Tharoor ke tweet me jo "Exasperating Farrago of distortions, misrepresentation and outright lies" tha na, wo hai ye aadmi. He wrote a book, containing 12 essays, about how USA government is leading toward progressive way(in 1950). Ab koun samjhaye yha khud ki country ki government nhi smjh aa rhi, aur mai chalu America ka bhojha bhi dhou. Aur mai English Language student hu, mujhe ye kyu pdha rhe ho bc ki USA ne kya teer mara hai.
*Control Uday.. Control*
  OK so i heard that question properly, but i didn't want to answer that question so i ignore my invigilator, and act like ki maine unhe suna nhi, and passed the register towards her with following lines, "Sorry professor, you were asking something?" And guess what happened, she was still on the same fucking book. But the question is changed now, a relaxation you can say! So now she asks, "what you think, why Bartend, named his book 'Unpopular essays'?" I gave her logical answer but inside my head i was thinking, abe jab ese chutiyape likhega..to unpopular he rahega na, padhe likhe ganwar. And after 5 or 10 mins of the Q&A, she ask us to show our assignments to her. OK Let me take you in another flashback moment. As you all know these Assignments are always being finished at the very last moment of due date. But this is my story motherfuckers, it's got a twist, that never happened in the history of mankind. So we were told to do a assignment and get a signature of professor in last month of our second year, or as i can say 2 months before the exams. And due to my laziness, i didn't start writing my assignment even after being so close to due date of having a  signature on it. And the date passed. And undoubtedly i loose all my hope to get even passing marks in my Viva. So one week before the exams of language, when everyone starts preparation for exams, i got a inspiration to complete my assignment, and that was  too lengthy that it went for 92 pages and my 3 nights and 2 days too. But i don't have any signature on it, to phat ke darzan bhar to ab bhi hui thi, kahi reject kar diya..to sala 3 rat jagna bhi doob jayega.. and when the day of war came i noticed ki sab ke assignments par signature the, so I decided not to tell anyone that i don't have signature on it. And luckily my examiner didn't niticed bout that signature even when I'm the first student. That's second time i felt Hardwork really pays off, the first time when i felt it was when i born.
  So in this way the viva kept on, for almost 20min, but that 20min is as long as a Monday for me at that time. And when she done with me, she smiled at us both and asked us to go. So when i turn from my chair, i felt like, I just remove a lot of pain from my ass, it's felt awesome to leaving the room, after being fucked in whole time there. Exam halls are such an amazing place, for we boys actually, see na, we got the dick, but we are the one who got fucked.
  So after all these stuffs when we get out of the room, dude the nomber of fuckers out there waiting for us to came out is too damn high. In whole these two years, i never surrounded by these much girls and boys at the same time.. and everyone is looking at us for their queries.. and my that colleague whom i ditch for seat in the room, took his revenge, by pushimg me on the side where mostly boys are standing, and he himself went for girls, fuck you KARMA For this! And dude there's no problem in describing the scenario of room too them, the problem is i have to tell each of them the same story, by just rotating my face on their side.. it sucks!
  So anyhow i make myself out from those fuckers and went to my friends, who are waiting for their turn on another room's side. OK let's move ahead to my favorite part, so these two rooms are at the edge of a gallery, one is at opposite edge of other. So i went to the second edge where my friends are waiting for their turn, and suddenly i saw someone at the place where i just came from. And yes, this someone is a 'She'. We are classmates if English language classes for these two years, I've a crush on her from the very first day of college, and we barely talk to each other ever, the conversation between was too rare that i wouldn't be wondered if she even don't know my name, by knows her, the only thing i ask to her i think.. yeah seems so. So there's a friend of mine who desperately wants to me to be in a relationship more than i want myself to be in a relationship. And he also know about this girl, so he told me that anyhow i should talk to her, and a long enough talk to get her contact. And as usual, use dekhate hi meri phatani shuru ho gayi.. because she was also looking at me ..damn these moments, so i get afraid a lot and i really need an inspiration kinda thing to go to her, so i went to another room, and call my friend, he inspired me this much by his INSPIRATION LANGUAGE (you know which one), i even can propose my HOD right at the moment. But but but, suddenly my another friend call me, and i thought it's OK I've a lot of time, so spent almost half and hour at the room, and after drinking a liter water i prepare myself for this.. i went to that edge where she was standing.. but guess that was too late.. matlab apan ka chutiya fir se kat hi gaya. She was gone, and i don't have anyway to find her, and j even don't know  that she is gonna be in same subjects like me or not.
And i can say i got fucked uo twice in a day.
Bad Luck i guess so!

Ok guys that's it from my side. Thank you for reading me, and if you love/like this series then please share it to your friends, and share it too if you ever attend 'The Great Viva Day' like this or even not, share kar do warna sabko bol dunga tu bol rha tha Mandir Wha Nahi Banega. Tricked you ;)

  Abhi kya padh rha? nikal abhi.

The Great Viva day - part 1

So guys, as you all know that I'm going through my exams and in this way, I've to attend The Great viva day. So i did. And it was probably the funniest and scariest viva I've ever attend at a same time. You know what the worst thing is about a viva? No? Let me tell you, the worst thing about a viva is that you have to answer the questions of few humans... in a decent way, even when you know that the questions and those humans both aren't good for your health. Seriously guys, sitting in front of examiners for viva, it's like you've been pushed itno a deep and dark jungle, for search of a lion, who gonna hunt you down in anyway. Ever felt it? Ok let's move ahead, so according to my habbit, I reached late at ground zero, and just according to their habbit my university wasn't ready for the viva on that time, you know what, these are the moments that let me feel we(me and my university) are made for each other. Love birds with same habits, dafaq!
  So viva starts an hour late to its' time. In very start i was very sure that my turn is going to be at the end of the day, because they are leading it with the alphabetic order, and I've got 'S' in my name so i was very sure and thankful about it that I'm not gonna be first in anyway. But but but, here comes the surprise, in a fucking wrong way. So after the very start Peon came to us and told us that viva of half of the people going to be held in another room, and to told us to go their and check our name in the list, and as i said i always get to fucked at the right moment, my name came just on the top of the list in second room's candidates. I things this is only time when i top a list. And believe me after reading my name there on top, my feets start vibrating, my ears went as hot as a volcano. Buffff! Seriously such a hard moment. So, they(invigilators) are calling us in a pair. And the guy who is next to me was unavailable at the moment so the second next dude put his hands on my shoulders and said to me, "pahle tu ja!". I was there like, why dafaq always me. And because I've got an extra ordinary skill to convince someone, i convince that dude to walk in together. Now feel the scenario here, we are just in the front of the door, peon opened it, and on other side of the door, two lady invigilators are waiting for us, with a smiley face. Uff that smile, mine mother never gives me that smile after seeing me. It was sweet but heat of the moment was briefing it in another way. So they two was at their seat, they call us to them, one of them was Bengali, and she known as English Hitler. So what i know, that anyhow i shouldn't put my self infront of her. And this time i won. I make myself away from her, even after sitting next to her. And the guy who is mext to me take a sight to me, and i know he must be thinking, "marwa li bc me". Par kurbaniya to deni hi pdti hai.
   So the first question my invigilator ask to me was, "what's your roll no. Son?" And the first thing came into my mind was, "chalo ye ata hai!".
                                               ..be continued in part 2.

    Ok guys this isn't the end. I decided to divide the story into two parts kyuki apane ko bhi hits chahiye me mamu! So put you thoughts down there in comment, share it with your friends, if you like it, then describe your feel in comment box, and if you don't then galiya bhi dedo, bs comment karo bc. And stay in touch for the next part, a huge twist in the story is yet to come. Thanks for your time.
   Damn, i hate typing, mai ab bhi kyu type rha bc?